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I don't have any heading to write. I don't know but I feel that life is so unpredictable. I don't know this small accident again made me realise, I don't know when will the last day of my life. I don't know what will happen the very next moment. I don't know whether I'll be able to speak to my close people again. I don't know where the life will take. It feels like I really don't know but their is that sudden feeling of anxiousness. 

I don't know meeting with this again, made me realise so many things. But I also do know apart from my parents, I've few people who'll be there throughout. Akka is a forever person for me.❤️

Even Akka's friend had accident two days back. I had asked that time, how he was. And today he texted me saying how I'm. Even he talked to me for around 30 mins. And I felt so better. He asked about the doctor, the medicines, bandages and everything. And it felt so genuine. Even Akka does the same. And Akka was telling me today, that she'll scold both of us on conference call at night. 

Here, I've a Bhaiya (brother) at hostel. He is one of the most genuine guy I ever met. He consider me as his sister. Trust me, when I was at Allen, and thought of going to hostel. I thought to call him rather than my warden. He goes with us everyday for morning walk. 

Today when he saw me. He actually brought volini for me. I said him, "I'll go to room and bring money". But he insisted me to sit there and take rest. Even he helped me in walking. I couldn't walk alone before that. But now, I'm much better. Though it's paining alot. 

Even few minutes, I called warden Di, and he was down there, so he picked the call. And trust me he said this, "beta, drink milk and sleep early. And if you need any help just call me". I'm not saying all these because he helped me today. 

But I had seen him since so many days. He helps everyone. And that's why he has so many sister. 😅❤️

I don't know but for a moment sometimes I feel. What if all the dreams I'm dreaming now gets shattered? What if everything ends? I don't know but it seems like I don't know what will happen the next moment. Will I be alive even?

I was thinking about cutie today. I felt happy atleast he doesn't know. And then I actually wondered, even though if he gets to know, will he care? Few days back, Akka had said something related to her friend (he is her ex). And how she got worried when he met with accident. 

So I just said her "I understand, even cutie ever says me he got a small cut, I'll be worried more than him". And she was like, "I know, how you are. You will take the complete medical team with you at his room". But is the same valid for him? Does he care even? 

I don't know but I'm just afraid. So many bad things are happening with me. And that's why may be I'm luttel nervous. Tensed about what will happen the next. I'm a kind who lives in present. Even few minutes back, Everything was normal. But I don't know, I'm feeling so terrible now. It's like everything will end. 

I'm not able to walk properly. I don't know where my life will take me. And I actually thinking all these now. I wish cutie was here. I really wish. No, not as a boyfriend but as a friend. But what's the use. I'm wishing this since last 6 months. But it didn't happened. And now, I know, it won't ever happen. I don't expect even. 

But sometimes, may be sometimes, we need those people back in life whom we love unconditionally. We need their support. We need someone just to say, "everything will be okay". And I know, nothing will be okay in my life. 

Edited:
I don't know but few minutes back, I got a call from Akka. And I don't know I said her all these things. And she said me, "be positive". At a point, I couldn't come near the camera. And then she just said me, "take rest, will talk tomorrow". I don't know but it felt so bad. May be it's normal. May be I'm over reacting. But I'm alone. And I'm feeling bad coz I met with another accident within 5 months. 

I texted her saying at the end, "I wish you had said me, "everything will be okay" rather than be positive". 

Don't know but everything is bad. Everything happening around is bad. I hate everything.

And then this happened. 

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