Dear Lover

By -
Dear lover,

I read poems and relate them with you. I know you don't read any and in case you read then also may be you don't remember me. I know you don't remember that stupid, idiot girl whom you used to love alot. I see pages turning around of our books and find your name vanishing day by day. I try finding your name in one or two but it keeps on vanishing till I get on the last page. 

Few days back, it was around 1 when I was holding my breath tightly so that the tears don't spill around. I firmly holded that pillow beside me as a reminder that I'm not alone. I listened to your voice 2 days back and yesterday too. Sorry, but I couldn't sleep whole night thinking about you. 

I heard one recording where we had fight one day back and you just said sorry for being busy for days. I remember, in the recording you said my name. Trust me, I was in deep sleep when you said, "Ankita" and I woke up within seconds thinking you came back. 

Yesterday I listened to one where you said what if I take 3-4 years to express my words. To which I said, it's okay I'll wait. May be you took that damn seriously. 

Few days back, we had wedding bells. Trust me, the moment I worn my favourite dress. All standing there said, I look beautiful. But I don't know why but my ears wanted to hear your voice. 

I saw beautiful couples there and wished we could be too here. Whenever I pray, you are first whose name I say. It's been year since we met. Trust me, it feels like days. 

Dear lover,

May be I won't love you always. May be there will be days, when I won't message you, until you say. Trust me, on those days, just hold me tighter. And say that you won't leave ever. That's what might be I wish to hear.

Seeing love losing against destiny is what torments me. I knew it was going to hurt and still be beautiful. 

I don't know you'll ever write poems about me. I don't know you'll ever talk to someone about me. I don't know you'll ever adore my pictures. I don't know you'll ever wish to hear my voice again. And honestly, I don't know why I'm writing this to you. I don't know if you'll read this. I don't know if this will ignite something inside you. I don't know you'll ever message me. I don't know whether we'll talk again. And I really don't know what keeps us holding from being together again.

But trust me, when I read incomplete poetries, I want us to make its end. I don't know but I still love you. And I wish that you message me again ;)

Thank you 💙

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular

Three jewels of life

By -
Image
Once a man asked what's the most satisfying feeling in world ? To which  a wise man replied , "  the most satisfying of all feeling is connection to the soul , to the human spirit ". Spirituality is something that adds meaning to life. It's connection to something bigger than our thoughts . Have we ever realised why people do yoga and meditation? They do so because it's connection to one's mind. Meditation is direct connection to oneself. It's a form of spirituality.  Here I am going to write about my favourite you tuber , who indeed is an spiritual leader , "Gaur Gopal Das jii".  His stories are quiet famous around the globe . But I am going to write about the  three important jewels of life. Once a man was in forest . He saw a beautiful bird. As soon as he saw her . He wished to keep her at his home. So he caged  her from back . The bird being caged now said to the man .  She will tell him three important jewels of life onl...
Read more

A love to last

By -
Image
Talking about the most underrated feeling in the world , " self love".  We are living in the generation where everyone is busy finding love or most probably saying life partner. But what about self love , self care ?? Does they don't matter ?  In one of the finest movie of bolywood ,   Dear Zindagi .  Their is a dialogue where the psychiatrist says to the actress , " Jab hum Apne aap ko Achi Tarah samajh Lete hai toh doosre kya samajhte hai , it doesn't matter ,  NOT AT ALL " . I think this is so true .  When we start loving ourself then it doesn't matter who love us or who care about us or what they think of us. In the same movie , there is an infamous dialogue ,  " tum agar khulke roo nhi sakogi ..toh khulkar Hass kaise sakogi". This is worth reading the lines.  If we can't show anger to anyone then how can we love someone. How can we feel worthy of ourselves .  We should care about our self esteem and self respect. We should really fe...
Read more

Teen ager thoughts !! 🦋

By -
Teen age the most dramatic phase of our life. The age where each day our opinions about everything changes. The things we like today might not be the same tomorrow. The people with whom we love to spend time today won't be the same tomorrow. In between the hormone rush , we decide lots of things related to our future. Whether it can be career, college, jobs , friendship , love and so on. We don't even know whether we really want that or not . The transition that take place in this ongoing years are remarkable. The things we get addict to know whether good or harmful keeps going on till the end until someone help us to stop it.  The uncertainty about everything marks the teenage . Changes that take place in our mindset becomes the reason for all the choices we take . Time goes on and so is the phase.  Sometimes we are lonely  , sometimes together with everyone. Sometimes we hate everyone and sometimes everyone is important. Sometimes someone takes the special place without...
Read more

What DEATH Taught Us ?

By -
Since childhood , we all are interested in knowing what happens after death . Whether their is really heaven or hell ? These are the most intriguing questions we all have . But what about the lessons we learn in the process?  We all discuss about :  1. What life teaches us?  2. How life teaches us ?  3. About how karma works in life ?            But what about death ? Why don't we discuss what death taught us? Why don't we talk about the lessons we learnt after some one left us ?  I remember watching the video of Gaur Gopal Das jii where he mentioned about his father's death and how much he regretted about not saying sorry to him for the mistakes he did everytime. This is what death taught us . The importance of person when they are gone. The importance of relationship infront of being right.  The importance of love Infront of ego.  Once lost then they can't come back . This is the most depressing one - liner. Once we lost...
Read more

What irritates me these days?

By -
Image
Messages and calls.  I had my exam today. After getting bored from last 1 hour. I finally thought to write something. My battery percentage decreased from 16% to 11% while charging, when I was using my phone.  I don't know but these days I get so many messages on WhatsApp and so many calls. Majorly calls are from either from my family or my friends (warden and my neighbour too).  The same goes with whatsapp messages but they are more than enough. Yesterday Akka had sent me my whatsapp usage. And all were of 2 mins majorly. Only Akka is the one who message me randomly. Rawat and Shruti (sometimes) too otherwise rest all just for work. It sucks actually. No one to talk real apart from few.  in one day I get around 10 messages. And it's of everyday.🙄 Obviously I get messages related to study from my friends or something that's important. I don't check status even. Majorly at night or when I come back from class (only of those whose I...
Read more